Nothing but destruction. I lost my Father to the ravages of alcohol and prescription drugs. He was eventually clean and sober but a hollow shell and dependant on numbing antidepressants. Even after recovery, there are no guarantees and he was never the same. We lived with a ghost. These warnings are important and education on dealing with the reason drugs are chosen... usually to numb or avoid something. So many lives ruined.
you have such a sharp sense of humor and I appreciate it so much.
we are such sensitive creatures, yet we don't see it when we're amped up or dulled down. it's amazing what happens when there are no drugs at all, not even caffeine, nicotine, or alcohol. the head is a chemical factory all its own, not that I recommend zero addictive substances necessarily, but it is astonishing what we have as a default. not sure where sugar falls on the addiction spectrum, if at all, but it appears to me that it might.
the funny thing about addiction is what it does to our brains and our own sense of trust. it breaks the connection between the body and the mind in such a way that we are further disconnected from ourselves than we were when we decided to use drugs to alleviate the pain we felt from the disconnection we were already feeling.
the irony is also astonishing. the promise is a lie. it's such a twisty, turny path. if drugs don't destroy you (your life, your body, your brain) then they will destroy who you think you are* and remove you from who you actually are, which prevents you from becoming who you are destined to be.
there's a saying, God made whiskey so the Irish wouldn't take over the world. half in fun, whole in earnest. we don't need to limit ourselves.
thank you for sharing this writing with us
*just a quick caveat, I'm fully aware that LSD and other substances have SOME capacity to remove us from 'who we think we are' as in the ego, but that's not what I was talking about there, carry on!
After reading your comment, I simply have to share:
— My best friend at school’s father was addicted to “buttons” (methaqualone) and meth. By far one of the most educated people I have ever had the pleasure of conversing with. Anyhoo, whenever he exhaled that button smoke, wobbly and dwanky, eyes practically closed, he’d mumble: “The moment your mother gave you your first gram of sugar, you were done for”. I believe he made a good point.
— Super excited to share what I learned this week! On the point of disconnect and distrust; it’s all oxytocin! Or a lack thereof! Addiction reduces oxytocin and can even inhibit oxytocin production. That’s why people get paranoid, suspicious, unfaithful in relationships, why mothers seem unable to connect with their children, emotional regulation goes out the window etc.
This little bit of info was the highlight of my week (learning new things is one of my favourite things!). I hope you find it as interesting as I did.
Dear Dope (and I mean that in the most affectionate way),
every word of this rings true.
what's funny, is that I wanted to mention childbirth before I realized your name. that's where I think it begins, not with sugar (but what a great point). it's with the separation of child and mother, even before she leaves hospital. I know some (men) will balk (and women who swear by c-sections). Dr. Gabor Mate's book, MYTH OF NORMAL, talks about this. and yes, oxytocin. that's why (and this sounds woo-woo) it all comes back to love (or lack, as you said).
trust is the way back. connection is the way. and it's hard, because capitalism drives disconnection, that's the way it works.
Absolutely. I've traced my struggle back to gestation. My parents never wanted children and took every precaution, but the copper T failed. My father was abusive towards my mother, so she was in a perpetual survival state. I was born via c-section and had "colic". Dad didn't take well to incessant crying, so my aunt took me in when I was just a few weeks old. I was the little girl she so desperately wanted, but gave up on after the birth of her fourth boy; those boys didn't like it one bit, so I was ostracised & bullied by my "brothers"... And the rest is history in the making.
I am currently reading The myth of normal. I have been for a year. Who has the time these days, right? But I'll get through it in due time, I'm sure.
I think sugar is, for many, not the cause but the first experience of addiction.
Fascinating story. you have a great story. Funny thing is, I’ve been reading the same book for about as long. I don’t know why. All of the other books go so much faster. And it’s not that I’m not really enjoying it. I’m really enjoying the idea, because I know that it’s important, but for some reason, I keep putting it down.
This is a compelling essay and very true. Addiction is so powerful; people do all sorts of things to feed their addictions. Seeking out help like a 12-step program is key to helping those people who face additctions.
And, as we know, it adversely affects family and friends.
I used to circle the drain on drugs.
living zombie, alive but dead.
now i'm just alive. very alive.
Substack is my new drug.
xx
Thank you for sharing your journey. I am happy you have Substack instead. Sending love.
You are not alone, my friend. I am sending you love and hugs. I am here for you.
Wise words Rea 💪
Thank you, Esther. 💗
Nothing but destruction. I lost my Father to the ravages of alcohol and prescription drugs. He was eventually clean and sober but a hollow shell and dependant on numbing antidepressants. Even after recovery, there are no guarantees and he was never the same. We lived with a ghost. These warnings are important and education on dealing with the reason drugs are chosen... usually to numb or avoid something. So many lives ruined.
Not only the addicts' lives are destroyed, but the family who is left with the aftermath of it. I am sorry you suffered because of this too, Terry. 💞💞
Absolutely, actually I think you have helped my Mother, Tina with her memoir…you may not have made the connection.
I have, Terry. But I didn't think it was my place to mention it here. 🤗❤️
https://thejunglechaosco.substack.com/p/land-of-the-red-mouths-papuas-favorite?r=6xmz51
Thanks Pavel! I read the article.
The first step is in my opinion the hardest because admitting you have a problem is humiliating.
I agree, Maralet. I am happy to see you!
this is such a powerful post thank you for writing it. I hope that it will reach the ones who need it most.
Me too, Meredith! Thank you. 🙏
you have such a sharp sense of humor and I appreciate it so much.
we are such sensitive creatures, yet we don't see it when we're amped up or dulled down. it's amazing what happens when there are no drugs at all, not even caffeine, nicotine, or alcohol. the head is a chemical factory all its own, not that I recommend zero addictive substances necessarily, but it is astonishing what we have as a default. not sure where sugar falls on the addiction spectrum, if at all, but it appears to me that it might.
the funny thing about addiction is what it does to our brains and our own sense of trust. it breaks the connection between the body and the mind in such a way that we are further disconnected from ourselves than we were when we decided to use drugs to alleviate the pain we felt from the disconnection we were already feeling.
the irony is also astonishing. the promise is a lie. it's such a twisty, turny path. if drugs don't destroy you (your life, your body, your brain) then they will destroy who you think you are* and remove you from who you actually are, which prevents you from becoming who you are destined to be.
there's a saying, God made whiskey so the Irish wouldn't take over the world. half in fun, whole in earnest. we don't need to limit ourselves.
thank you for sharing this writing with us
*just a quick caveat, I'm fully aware that LSD and other substances have SOME capacity to remove us from 'who we think we are' as in the ego, but that's not what I was talking about there, carry on!
Strange that you mentioned here what I've always said, Andrew.
Drugs take you away from yourself. I saw something else when I researched this.
"Drugs gives you wings, then it takes away the sky".
Profound.
After reading your comment, I simply have to share:
— My best friend at school’s father was addicted to “buttons” (methaqualone) and meth. By far one of the most educated people I have ever had the pleasure of conversing with. Anyhoo, whenever he exhaled that button smoke, wobbly and dwanky, eyes practically closed, he’d mumble: “The moment your mother gave you your first gram of sugar, you were done for”. I believe he made a good point.
— Super excited to share what I learned this week! On the point of disconnect and distrust; it’s all oxytocin! Or a lack thereof! Addiction reduces oxytocin and can even inhibit oxytocin production. That’s why people get paranoid, suspicious, unfaithful in relationships, why mothers seem unable to connect with their children, emotional regulation goes out the window etc.
This little bit of info was the highlight of my week (learning new things is one of my favourite things!). I hope you find it as interesting as I did.
Dear Dope (and I mean that in the most affectionate way),
every word of this rings true.
what's funny, is that I wanted to mention childbirth before I realized your name. that's where I think it begins, not with sugar (but what a great point). it's with the separation of child and mother, even before she leaves hospital. I know some (men) will balk (and women who swear by c-sections). Dr. Gabor Mate's book, MYTH OF NORMAL, talks about this. and yes, oxytocin. that's why (and this sounds woo-woo) it all comes back to love (or lack, as you said).
trust is the way back. connection is the way. and it's hard, because capitalism drives disconnection, that's the way it works.
Absolutely. I've traced my struggle back to gestation. My parents never wanted children and took every precaution, but the copper T failed. My father was abusive towards my mother, so she was in a perpetual survival state. I was born via c-section and had "colic". Dad didn't take well to incessant crying, so my aunt took me in when I was just a few weeks old. I was the little girl she so desperately wanted, but gave up on after the birth of her fourth boy; those boys didn't like it one bit, so I was ostracised & bullied by my "brothers"... And the rest is history in the making.
I am currently reading The myth of normal. I have been for a year. Who has the time these days, right? But I'll get through it in due time, I'm sure.
I think sugar is, for many, not the cause but the first experience of addiction.
Fascinating story. you have a great story. Funny thing is, I’ve been reading the same book for about as long. I don’t know why. All of the other books go so much faster. And it’s not that I’m not really enjoying it. I’m really enjoying the idea, because I know that it’s important, but for some reason, I keep putting it down.
Understand that bad things have bad effects. It only takes consistency to avoid it.
Precisely, Jybyky!
I feel this one, addiction is brutal. Especially that last section about prescription drug addiction. Its a shame when things spiral out of control.
Sadly we don't know until it's too late. Thank you, Ryan.
Hi Rea,
This is a compelling essay and very true. Addiction is so powerful; people do all sorts of things to feed their addictions. Seeking out help like a 12-step program is key to helping those people who face additctions.
And, as we know, it adversely affects family and friends.
It breaks my heart, Beth. Thank you.
Thanks for the restack, TbG!