I am so sorry for your loss and I am so terribly sorry that someone would even have the audacity to say something like that to you in your grief. My favorite quote on grief is “Grief is a love story told backwards.” It gets me every time. I’m tearing up thinking of you and your son. Sending love and light to you.
This is beautiful, Rea. May your beautiful son rest in eternal peace and may he continue to send you the signs that bring you comfort.
Gos is holy, unbridled, pure love itself, who shows nothing but grace to all of his children. I pray the person who had the audacity to tell you otherwise, has shifted their belief system. 🙏
Thank you Stephanie. I know he is at peace. I attended a Catholic silent retreat during my grief and met with the Bishop after Mass. He set my mind at ease about this. He called it outdated and said exactly what you said here. God is love.
can't imagine how much that must have been to go through but I'm glad that you found some light, this brought tears to my eyes but it is beautiful in its own way. Thank you.
It angers me how people make those who die by suicide villains. I don't believe it, but it is rough when you're suffering enough already, to have others hit you with their fears
Your words, Rea. Wow! I hate the stigma that has long surrounded suicide. The fallacies propagated by many cultures and dogmas. It's an unfair burden to place such fallacies (deemed "truths") on those who are already burdened with so much. I'm so glad you are finding your own peace and truths.
I can't remember where I heard this but I always remembered it: There's often nothing you can say to make it better, but there are things you can say that can make it worse. Going into delicate situations, the goal should be to not say anything that makes it worse. Show up. Stay quiet. Listen. Validate.
Beautiful, Rea. I lost a dear friend to suicide in college. His family church was very conservative and a woman came up to our friend group at his funeral and told us the same thing. Some ‘Christians’ are so cruel. I’m so glad you hear from your son and know that he is well. And I love the synchronicity of our posts today. Love is eternal.
Hey Rea, I am Catholic and don’t quite accept every human interpretation of Jesus’s will. Jesus created your son’s eternal soul and I highly doubt that such a loving and gentle person as Jesus would condemn his beautiful and innocent creation to eternal suffering. It’s not rationale at all. I still go to church, confession and pray the usual Hail Mary, Our Father, Gloria and one to Saint Michael the Archangel. And I hope to go to Heaven. But I am in doubt about a few of the interpretations that didn’t come directly from Jesus’s words.
Looks like Dymphna is patron Saint of suicide victims.
Btw; “Dymphna is the patron saint of mental illness. The US National Shrine of St. Dymphna is located inside St. Mary's Catholic Church in Massillon, Ohio.” Wikipedia
I believe that good people, no matter how they go or what they believe in, will get a peaceful rest. And seeing what a beautiful person you are, I can imagine that Emile was the same and is at peace <3
The ‘righteous’ can be so wretched sometimes. Such a dangerous thing is certainty in the hands of the unthinking. I cannot surpass what Gibran would say but I agree with it. Sometimes we say more by saying less.
Losing someone like that is not something anyone can understand unless they have been there. I am glad you were able to find peace knowing that he felt the burdens of the earthly plane were too much and that he is at a better place where he is now. It is not easy for those of us who remain. Again, sorry you had to go through that. Glad you were able to continue on. We are glad you are sharing your story with us.
Your story weighed on me today. It gave me strength and I have some empathy for the “how did I miss that?” Part of it. I received a call today that someone close to me was considering doing exactly what your son did and now I am having to sit on pins and needles because I don’t know if they will or they won’t. I thought about the stories you shared about your experience. From them, I drew strength and hope for a better tomorrow. For my loved one and for my sanity. For now, this is still their earthly plane. I can only hope we can provide the help they need. Thank you for just being here and I thank Substack for allowing you to be.
I am so sorry for your loss and I am so terribly sorry that someone would even have the audacity to say something like that to you in your grief. My favorite quote on grief is “Grief is a love story told backwards.” It gets me every time. I’m tearing up thinking of you and your son. Sending love and light to you.
It shocked me to my core! Thank you for your loving words Melanie. Sending love and light right back!
This is beautiful, Rea. May your beautiful son rest in eternal peace and may he continue to send you the signs that bring you comfort.
Gos is holy, unbridled, pure love itself, who shows nothing but grace to all of his children. I pray the person who had the audacity to tell you otherwise, has shifted their belief system. 🙏
Thank you Stephanie. I know he is at peace. I attended a Catholic silent retreat during my grief and met with the Bishop after Mass. He set my mind at ease about this. He called it outdated and said exactly what you said here. God is love.
can't imagine how much that must have been to go through but I'm glad that you found some light, this brought tears to my eyes but it is beautiful in its own way. Thank you.
Thank you for saying it is beautiful. That is exactly what I wanted you to see! Sending love and light back to you!
Sending love and support, this must have been so painful to write - your beautiful precious boy ❤️
Thank you Rita. Sharing my journey has healed me. Comments like yours heal. Thank you for reading and reaching out.
It angers me how people make those who die by suicide villains. I don't believe it, but it is rough when you're suffering enough already, to have others hit you with their fears
You're right Boo, it is senseless.
Our souls are eternal, and while that doesn’t change your current reality, it hopefully provides some solace and peace in your own soul.
It does Mandolin! Thank you. 💞
This makes my heart ache.
I’m so sorry your son was taken from you.
Suicide is so misunderstood.
Please reach out if you ever want support.
Thank you Aliyah.💞
Your words, Rea. Wow! I hate the stigma that has long surrounded suicide. The fallacies propagated by many cultures and dogmas. It's an unfair burden to place such fallacies (deemed "truths") on those who are already burdened with so much. I'm so glad you are finding your own peace and truths.
Thank you Lindsay! I know, it is sad. People just blunder through life, talking without thinking.
I am deeply grateful I finally healed. 🩷
I can't remember where I heard this but I always remembered it: There's often nothing you can say to make it better, but there are things you can say that can make it worse. Going into delicate situations, the goal should be to not say anything that makes it worse. Show up. Stay quiet. Listen. Validate.
You are right Lindsay. Just be there and give love and support.
Beautiful, Rea. I lost a dear friend to suicide in college. His family church was very conservative and a woman came up to our friend group at his funeral and told us the same thing. Some ‘Christians’ are so cruel. I’m so glad you hear from your son and know that he is well. And I love the synchronicity of our posts today. Love is eternal.
At the funeral? That is awful. I don't understand cruelty. Your heart is broken, but it seems irrelevant to them.
Thank you Jen. It was amazing when I saw your post! The Universe is magical.
Hey Rea, I am Catholic and don’t quite accept every human interpretation of Jesus’s will. Jesus created your son’s eternal soul and I highly doubt that such a loving and gentle person as Jesus would condemn his beautiful and innocent creation to eternal suffering. It’s not rationale at all. I still go to church, confession and pray the usual Hail Mary, Our Father, Gloria and one to Saint Michael the Archangel. And I hope to go to Heaven. But I am in doubt about a few of the interpretations that didn’t come directly from Jesus’s words.
Looks like Dymphna is patron Saint of suicide victims.
Btw; “Dymphna is the patron saint of mental illness. The US National Shrine of St. Dymphna is located inside St. Mary's Catholic Church in Massillon, Ohio.” Wikipedia
I didn't know that. Thank you, my friend. I know he is safe and loved.
Interesting, I grew up Catholic about an hour from Massillon and did not know about the shrine. Thank you for sharing.
Rea, this is so beautiful. I can almost see your son dancing and sending you messages. I Believe This.
I'm so happy you see it too Patty! Thank you. 💕
I have heard those words spoken and I am sorry that somebody thought they should say such a thing to you. 🫂
I believe we all return to that source of love when we pass, no matter the circumstances.
I too contemplated suicide in my life when things seemed hopeless.
I am glad you found peace to carry on. Your story and that of your son, are important and meaningful. Someone somewhere needs to hear them. 💞
That you for saying this Debra! Much love. 💞
That was supposed to be thank you. 😊
I'm so sorry that someone dared to tell you that.
I believe that good people, no matter how they go or what they believe in, will get a peaceful rest. And seeing what a beautiful person you are, I can imagine that Emile was the same and is at peace <3
You touch my heart Sandra. Thank you for your kind words. 🩷🩷
Beautiful
Thank you Amy! 💞
The ‘righteous’ can be so wretched sometimes. Such a dangerous thing is certainty in the hands of the unthinking. I cannot surpass what Gibran would say but I agree with it. Sometimes we say more by saying less.
Dangerous Joe. Thank you!
Losing someone like that is not something anyone can understand unless they have been there. I am glad you were able to find peace knowing that he felt the burdens of the earthly plane were too much and that he is at a better place where he is now. It is not easy for those of us who remain. Again, sorry you had to go through that. Glad you were able to continue on. We are glad you are sharing your story with us.
Thank you for your lovely words Aurelia. It used to anger me when people said he was in a better place. Now I know, he is. 🩷
Your story weighed on me today. It gave me strength and I have some empathy for the “how did I miss that?” Part of it. I received a call today that someone close to me was considering doing exactly what your son did and now I am having to sit on pins and needles because I don’t know if they will or they won’t. I thought about the stories you shared about your experience. From them, I drew strength and hope for a better tomorrow. For my loved one and for my sanity. For now, this is still their earthly plane. I can only hope we can provide the help they need. Thank you for just being here and I thank Substack for allowing you to be.
Thinking of you Aurelia! You can support them. Stay strong. 🩷